My rating: 4 of 5 stars
This was some wondiferous stuff… so many elements of what low self-esteem/worth/concept, hurtful & dysfunctional family of origin, and maladaptive coping behaviors do the life of so many women in the world.
This may be Cameron’s book but Eve most definitely steals the show. In the beginning of the book she somewhat comically has decided that she will from now on be a lesbian due to the harsh treatment and hurt she has suffered from almost every man in her life, starting with her father. No one believes her not even herself and try as she might one certain man gets her hot and bothered and even though she has no idea whether she can or should trust him or not… if nothing else this book teaches you, is that often times when you are just about to give up hope your salvation comes through. By salvation this in no way is to say that this is a case of “Captain Save A Ho” and many will judge and look down on Eve’s choices. However, from a realistic standpoint and a clinical stand point she is grasping at what she knows and trusts to fill the void of unconditional love in her life.
This is also not an example of CSAH, because Cameron himself is struggling with so many issues and demons, feelings of being irrelevant anymore, washed up, guilt, shame, and he fills those voids by throwing himself into work. When these two come together and the people in their lives come together that’s when change starts to take place. Sometimes you can want to change, you can want for things to be different… but you do need others to help you get there.
This book was most similar to me – to Fighting for Flight, in that you do have a woman who has really been beat down. Just every where she turns the ones that are supposed to love and support her and those that come into her life claiming to want to love her all have their own agendas and selfish desires. Yet, she still manages to pick herself up every day and try to make something out of her life. She still tries to find happiness when all the signs lead to her never finding it. If you have given up on love, or feel that you are about to I definitely recommend this book to you. Even if you were cynical and protecting your heart from the world but have love now, read this book because you will relate. If those that were supposed to be there for you weren’t/aren’t and yet you have made your own way, read this book! You will not regret it.
“The set of his eyes makes it look like he’s glaring, but the corner of his mouth is pulled up just enough to contradict. Not a smile, but a taunting. It’s predatory, dangerous with just enough soft to lure in his prey.”
“Look at me… I want you to listen very carefully… You’re not my slut… You’re not my fuck buddy… Tell me you get me.”
“Go to sleep. His hold tightens. I’ll fuck you for you breakfast.”
“No it’s about you. You give it to me the way I like, listen when I need you to listen, but fight me when I need you to fight me.”
“But words are just that. Words. Anyone can say things and even pretend that they mean them. They don’t mean anything.”
“Sooner or later a man has to decide. You wanna be the man she wants, or can you find it in you to be the man she needs? Figure that shit out, or bow out, and let a better man move in.”
“Falling isn’t always failure. Sometimes the biggest victories only happen when we’re brave enough to let go and give in to the pull.”
Series Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ikt5VmZGers