Posted January 23, 2018 by MeliMel in Book Love, Guest Posts & Reviews, Home, Meli Mel Review, Our Reviews, Release Blitz / 0 Comments




I crawled into Ryan Jensen’s bed that first night by accident.

I barely knew him. I thought it was his sister’s bed—her room. It took seconds to realize my error, and I should’ve left…
I didn’t. I didn’t jump out. I didn’t get embarrassed.
I relaxed.
And that night, in that moment, it was the only thing I craved.

I asked to stay. He let me, and I slept.

The truth? I never wanted to leave his bed. If I could’ve stayed forever, I would have.
He became my sanctuary.

Because—four hours earlier—my twin sister killed herself.

♥ ♥ ♥ 4 STARS ♥ ♥ ♥

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‘Ryan had become necessary to me. He shielded me, protected me. My head was above water with him. Without him, I would sink. I would drown alone.’

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Thanks to a promotion Mackenzie’s father gets, her family and she have to uproot their lives in order to move to another state. Things seem to be going pretty well since they moved. Mackenzie and her twin sister Willow are one day away from turning 18 years old when the most devastating thing happens to their family, Willow commits suicide and Mackenzie is the one who finds her. After such a gut-wrenching and traumatic experience, Mackenzie struggles to cope with the aftermath. She isn’t the only one struggling with her mourning and not knowing how to move on, her family is as well, especially her parents.

Things move quickly after Willow’s death with her parents arranging the funeral. Mackenzie is in a state of shock and doesn’t even know where she is when she finds herself in Ryan’s Bed. Thinking it was his sister she falls asleep next to him, finally resting for the first time since her sister’s death. She finds comfort and peace when she sleeps with Ryan, he soothes all her aches and pains with his mere presence. Ryan is no stranger to losing someone, as he lost his best friend a few years back. He understands what Mackenzie is feeling and what she is going through. What starts as a friendship quickly turns to love between them. Ryan understands her like no one else does, and he sees all of her when it seems like no notices her. He helps and supports her in trying to put her broken pieces together.

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‘I was trying to be someone Willow would have been proud of. Yes, she’d told me so many times that she was proud of me, but I didn’t fully believe her. I was still trying.’

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This was so much more than a love story. It was more about a young woman trying to survive under the weight of the grief she felt, the family issues that surrounded her, trying to discover how to be her own person without her twin by her side and all while dealing with daily teenage life. It was quite a journey to read her raw and innermost thoughts. It broke my heart for her and her family and how lost they became after Willow died. I loved Ryan in this book so much. Ryan was the support system Mackenzie needed when her own family couldn’t offer her that. He was sweet, strong and so mature for his age. He was the best boyfriend! I was so happy Mackenzie had him in her life.

There were a lot of up and downs in this book emotionally. I didn’t full on sob while reading this but I definitely teared up during certain parts. It made my heart ache but it also warmed me, especially when Mackenzie’s little brother Robbie was there. The whole story was very well written which doesn’t surprise me from Tijan. What did surprise me was that ending. I had goosebumps from that ending because I just never expected it. Overall, this book was a sad yet wonderful experience. It does have a melancholic tone to the story but it wasn’t all sad, there were a few moments that were so sweet and some that even made me smile. However, definitely be prepared for a few tears to slip. A great book to read if you’re looking for something to hit you right in the feels.

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